Apple

I bring to you a live post from the Apple store as I wait for an appointment to fix mah earbudz.

Within eyeshot: a tucked-in short-sleeved T-shirt over a long-sleeved T-shirt with jeans. A tucked in Polo shirt. Camo cargo pants. Cargo jorts. Merrells with ankle socks and said jorts. Another tucked-in Polo.

If people who buy Macs can't dress well, what hope is there for the rest of the world? I.e., those who use PCs and buy their computers and related products from Best Buy or Target or (gasp) CompUSA.com.

Unfortunately the Genius Bar applies only to geeky technology, not to fashion choices.

Until next time, majorly yours.

Pants = amazing

Apparently some time over the past year pants went out. The following is an image I actually received in by e-box from the great people at Victoria's Secret:



E-mail subject line: FALL TREND ALERT: PANTS.

I keed you not. I'm so glad that when I woke up late on this glorious Saturday morning I was made aware that pants are not only "returning," but they are in fact at the top of the fall trend list. Lolz.

Lolz lolz.

Until next time, majorly yours.

Sarah Palesin comparison to Michelle

So normally I avoid Republicans like I avoid people in the hall wearing Crocs, but last night I made an effort to be a good citizen and listen to their versions of things, at least as Rudy Giuliani and Sarah Palin see them. I had been hearing a lot of talk about the latter of these two, and I wanted to hear for myself what she had to say.

Unfortunately I couldn't really focus on either of them because I was too distracted by the audience, which was sheathed in glitter, feather boas, tall patriotic hats and American-flag themed eyeglasses. It looked like the muppets had a tragic run-in with Dick Cheney and the remnants were disposed of in St. Paul.

I mean, really. I saw a woman in a glittery red cowboy hat, red feather boa and I'm sure some sort of obnoxious pin that said "HOCKEY MOMS FOR PALIN." I remember another lady wearing eyeglasses that were coated with the pattern of the American flag. I'm sure Lenscrafters would approve of such tackiness, but Uncle Sam probably would not. And it sho don't make you more of a patriot.

Even Cindy herself looked like death in a lime-green suit. What was that? I'm pretty sure the last time I saw a human being wearing that color was in the fifth grade when we all worshipped at the altar of Lisa Frank.

Perhaps what made the evening's attire seem even worse was that each ensemble was topped off with a gaping mouth shouting "DRILL, BABY, DRILL!" or something equally inane and disturbing. The only thing more skerry than a stadium full of fervored Republicans is an Old Navy full of parents and children during the back-to-school sale. Actually they might be closer to a tie.

Palin's outfit wasn't too offensive, but it wasn't exactly exciting either. It was pretty blah. And I spent a good portion of my time trying to figure out how it worked. There was a collar, but it vanished into some sort of overshirt that was never really explained. Sort of like how people choose to live in Alaska, it didn't make much sense.

If I were going to vote based on personal fashion choices alone, the Democrats would have my vote by a long shot. Michelle Obama always looks fabulous and I don't seem to recall a vague taste of vomit in my mouth as I watched the DNC.

But then I would be voting for someone whose name rhymes with Osama, and y'all know I loves my country, like, WAY too much for that ish.

Until next time, majorly yours.